Rentaghost can, if one is so disposed, be admired on many levels, but it is most notable for its complete lack of shame. The show's keen verbal wit and love of wordplay were often overshadowed by its attitude toward jokes, which basically averred 'quantity not quality'. Writer Bob Block, deservedly embarrassed at the poverty of some of his puns and jests, came up with an ingenious narrative justification for them: he made it obvious that the characters themselves knew a bad joke when they heard one, and encouraged them to react with theatrical groans and complaints. This sheen of realism pre-empts sophisticated adult sitcoms such as Bloomin' Marvellous. Possibly the only other comedic device from children's TV to be assimilated into the mainstream in this way was Peter Glaze's frequent cries of 'Doh!' on Crackerjack, which later found its way into the Simpsons (although many feel this was a coincidence, and that both were tapping into a basic human archetype).
Block rapidly carved himself a niche. He stuck to his guns, in much the same way that the jokes stuck to the cast, and even managed the Doctor Who-esque feat of replacing one cast member without changing their gimmick. Thus Tamara Novek (Lynda Marchall, now better know as La Plante) became Miss Nadia Popov, who shared her comically chronic hay-fever. The sense of tension whenever the prop man appeared with a ludicrously unrealistic bunch of flowers is palpable in the finished programmes.
The sheer haplessness of the proceedings was further compounded by the occasional visits of Kenneth Connor as Whatsisname Smith. Since Rentaghost was, and is, not in the least bit scary, having a ghost whom the other characters regarded as being on the wrong side of laughable rubbed further arsenic into the wound.
Undoubtedly, though, the show's greatest contribution was in the field of slapstick. Slapstick is a difficult and unrewarding art form at the best of times - but seldom has it seemed as difficult or unrewarding as on Rentaghost. The programme's slapstick sequences were so poorly conceived, set-up, constructed, acted, directed and edited that they inhabited a whole surreal world of their own. As yet another shower of water missed its target, or a cake in the face left only a vague outline of cream, the hapless actor, trying valiantly to save the BBC the trouble of a re-shoot, would work up the situation with a theatrical cry of "Oh, no! Look at me!"
To their credit, the cast quickly adapted to the particular kind of acting skill that the set-pieces required. Perhaps the most obvious ruse involved the actor mimicking a 'smart missile' - taking a swift side-step into the path of a misdirected jet of water as soon as its actual trajectory could be determined. Another tactic commonly employed, in the wake of an unimpressive pie-in-the-face, involved the actor increasing the cream spread through the pretence of wiping it from their eyes. The 'eye-wipe' is a masterpiece of mimetic overstatement - in fact, given the general lack of substance to remove, it borders on literally being mime. First the fingers describe an arc around the eyes, then the eyes are opened and the hands shaken, flinging minute dollops of foam to the floor. A quality performer, such as Ann Emery (Mrs Meaker), will throw frantic spluttering, blinking and general mugging into the mix, and the ensemble effect can be truly dreadful.
Even Block, that comedy Midas, found his ability to engineer a ludicrous piece of randomly occurring business (in every possible sense) stretched at times, and so the Talisman was swiftly introduced. With this tiresome device in place, the merest off-the-cuff remark by the Perkins could result in chaos for the Meakers, to pad out any flagging episode (which was most of them). Sadly, the hapless couple never thought to wish for a greater budget for Matt Irvine and his Vis/FX chums (not to say greater talent).
Rentaghost's final series, every episode of which ended with the cast emerging from an encounter with the dragon in the cellar and a thin application of soot-substitute, took the shows cheapskate slapstick shtick to its zenith. There was clearly nowhere for the series to go from here, so the production team wisely called it a day. Since then no other children's sitcom has come close to its energy, madness and sheer groan-along awfulness. Even Bob Block's follow-up show, Galloping Galaxies, was a failure, partly due to uninspired casting, but also because it was shite.
But Rentaghost's legacy lives on. Through the eighties, 'Oh No, Look At Me' acting could be seen everywhere, from Mr Bennett's u-bend antics in Take Hart, to , to the whole of the Little and Large show. Even quality actors have to resort to unsubtle milking when faced with slapstick; in the otherwise well-mounted Men Behaving Badly, Gary Strang receives a jet of water in the face for an unfeasibly long time in the titles each week.
Truly there is nothing so desperate as this unholy mismatch of actor, special effects man and make-up lady. So keep a look out for these priceless moments, and see if you can beat the poor sod to his cue: "Oh, no - look at you! Five years at RADA for this? You must be well gutted."
Article Text © 1998/2003 the respective author(s). All other text © Rob Morris / SAD Magazine. Design © Rob Morris 1999/2003. No reproduction of material in whole or in part may be undertaken without permission of the copyright holders.